i jhust puked up my retainher.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
