I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
