I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
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