Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I wannas sexs uuuuu
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Last night was epic. Hooked up with Emma Watson, found twenty bucks, and then passed out on my floor.
No you didn't. You drank unbelievable amounts of 151, passed out in someone else's bathroom, and we carried you back to your floor. Nice dreams though.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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