I woke up this morning and was hoping we drank enough last night to have a unicorn drawn on my wrist. Good News: We did.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize