Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Randomize
