Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I am available for nakedness
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
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