You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Randomize
