Please, let me fuck your mom
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
worst night to have a conscience
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
