Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
