But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
