You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Boobs are out for the taking
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
I think I just found my soul mate...he's wearing a zebra striped onesie and is into Michael Jackson...I'll explain in the morning.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
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