on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I felt like a body pillow being humped by a twelve year old.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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