It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
Randomize