Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Randomize
