my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
