My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
They can't keep moving my court date back, i dont know if I'll survive another one of these going away to jail parties.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Randomize
