i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
his text ended with ... everyone knows dot dot dot equals infer sexy time
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
Randomize
