pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize