I got my half for the rent already.I called the cops on the drug dealer neighbor and got a 500 bucks as a reward
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
