I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
At least a dozen asian tourists will be showing their friends pictures of me peeing off of Hoover Dam with a cop pointing his gun at me when they get home. I worry about the impact on their children.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
