If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I'm going to rape someone's good day.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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