well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
