Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Craig, a bottle of Jamison, and I had a party on the roof last night. No idea how I got down. My injuries indicate fall...
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
I'm way too hungover for life right now
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Randomize
