I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
