Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
