You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
