dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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