i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Thank you for letting me get drunk enough to forget he was there tonight, but not drunk enough to make a complete fool of myself.
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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