do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
