hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
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