I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Oh and itβs been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! ππππ¬π³π
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