It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
We don't have sex anymore. We both agree that the olympics are more important to watch. All day. Also i don't look good compared to the athletes...
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
Randomize
