plz talk dirty to me
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
