Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
