If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Oh my god. That was the best half-hour of my life that didn't involve genitals.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
