I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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