And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
