May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
BUT I'M ALSO ONLY IN IT FOR SEX AND HE CAN'T EVEN GET THAT PART RIGHT.LIKE LITERALLY ALL HE HAS TO DO IS DICK ME DOWN AND BE A DECENT HUMAN BEING IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK?!
Just made a secret hand shake with my sisters cat. Boredom at its finest.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
