So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
