This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I could tell by the Randy 'Machoman' Savage "hey brother" that you were beyond inebriated
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize