Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Randomize
