I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
We need a shit load of segways right now
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize