Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize