i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Well, I got fired yesterday. At least I already paid for my Adele tickets.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Randomize