If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
