you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Hillary said in her victory speech "We're gonna come together". I've got a lib-boner.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
