Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
Randomize
