You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
