idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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