i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I am sitting on the floor by my oven watching my cookie dough blossom. This is a whole new level of fat
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
